engineers | (no subject)

...I think I'd be more surprised if it didn't. Happen again, I mean. There are... were 31 of us. 30, now. That's ten people over a limit, if what Bucky said was true.

[ this response is a little more thoughtful, quieter as he drops his hands and fidgets with his fingers, tugs at the cuffs of his dress shirt absently. even if that requirement's set, it doesn't have to end in death. after all, among them, there might be ten people who can't drink to keep up. or maybe, ten people who don't want to be alive. he's not stupid enough to be optimistic that it won't end in death, though.

as for her question - he hums, an agreeing noise. ]

I am going to, yeah. I have a few questions I want to ask him, and... I'm sure he could probably use a listening ear, too.

I'm curious about what's going to happen to him - and, for that matter, what might've happened with Hunter, too.

The personal demons weren't very forthcoming when I prodded some, here and there.

The kindest answer I can guess at is being sent to a deeper, somewhat worse Circle of Hell. They did say that Hell is very wide, and they don't have jurisdiction over every corner.

The second kindest is oblivion.

[ The worst is, well, maybe a more traditional interpretation of Hell, but she'll spare LBX that. Besides, the imagination does so much worse at times. ]

Blue Hawaiian implied there were no concrete plans for the caught killer. I'm sure they'll come up with something.

More Dante-like, indeed.

[ it's okay, he's sort of picturing it, too. for hunter's sake, he hopes, maybe that oblivion is the kinder choice.

he reaches a hand up to scrub it over his face. ]

This whole thing did seem really slapdash. From top to bottom. I guess we'll just have to find out.

What do you make of it, Eto? The suggestion of the twenty person limit.

I wouldn't be surprised if it's true. The personal demons, while they weren't able to give me a concrete number, did imply to me that not everyone would get a guarantee. Based on our tolerances, as well as how interesting we could be.

If anything, given it's Hell -- twenty sounded generous, I thought.

I thought so, too. Two thirds of our number - that's not very exclusive at all.

[ he fusses with his cuff again. ] As for the demons - I wonder where he learned that information, too. Why him? Easy to prey on? Quick to act? Is the point to cull numbers, or is there a guaranteed ticket of interest if you kill someone, and... I guess, if you get away with it?

[ a pause. ] These are all such terrible questions.

I wonder if the number will dwindle over time. Just to give us a bigger sense of desperation, and hope someone else will start this all over again.

[ She hums. ]

He mentioned needing to get back to someone. Often, it's for another's sake that a person is most driven, rather than for themselves. And he's impulsive... emotional.

Easy to prey on would sound right, to me.

Impulsive, emotional. [ lu bixing repeats, softly, and adds - ] ...young, too.

[ a beat. ] So many of them are.

[ he doesn't address the bit about being driven for someone else, because boy, howdy, does he get that, but still. ]

[ She softens just a little bit, just for him. It's fucking infectious, at this point. ]

Teens in Hell. All the partying and murdering isn't good for their growth.

I'm not going to keep up with all of this energy, I'm too old.

[ that - gets him to laugh, actually, ducking his head, like he can't help it. pfft. ]

You and I both. [ bleak ]

Yeah, you might turn into dust before anyone gets around to killing you, old man.

[ She says, while calling him young man all the time too. Which is it. ]

[ rude. this pulls a more real smile, though, so there's that. ]

If we go by proportionality of lifespans, I'm younger than you are. I'm only twenty percent into mine compared to twenty-seven. We'll have to perish into dust together.

Hmm, I suppose that might be true. The average lifespan in Japan is late seventy- to eighty-odd years, but murder rates might bring that average a bit lower. Either way, I'm past "twenty percent".

And in fact, I am currently at zero percent.

[ Because we're hecking dead. ]

It's not bad company.

I guess I am, too. Or a hundred, if you look at it that way.

[ haha! he has to joke about that. it's fine. her joking about it makes him huff a laugh. ]

Not at all. Hell's not always other people. [ he leans over a little to give her a brief, light nudge with his shoulder. eto you're so small but thats ok. ] ...Thanks, Eto.

[ She is so small and you all are so large.

She's nudged, and there's brief silence, first. ]

What for?

For helping me cheer up, even just a little.

[ as much as one can, after those events, anyway. ] As terrible as things are, I'm glad we've met.

...

[ Huh... that's a first if she's ever heard one. Her barely restrained glee wasn't outside of her cognition; she's aware how unhinged it might have been. ]

You're weird, you know that?

[ this gets him to actually, really laugh, a surprised bark of a noise. ]

Not the first time I've heard that one! I mean it, though, I really do.

Well...

You are.

[ She's a curse upon this world. Not one has ever told her, I'm glad to have met you. ]

... What are you going to do, from here on?

[ drawing a heart on my beloved eto

he considers the question for a moment, thoughtfully looking out at the lava sea again. ]

...Well. Increase my tolerance, for one. [ a little lighter, joking. ] And I'm going to try and keep an eye on as many people as I can, and help where I can help. Beyond that...

[ a little huff, as he considers. it's an interesting question. ]

I guess we'll see what the future holds. I know that I want to live - and I know that I want to keep the Commander safe. Whether that's live here and win a contest to go home, or live here as a dead person, I know that I don't want to die, and I don't want to lose him again. [ lu bixing tilts his head, smile returning to something a little sad. ] Maybe that's a little too selfish of me.

Selfishness is the crux of human nature.

[ She says that, plainly. She finds it to be a fact, not damning and not belittling.

Everything in the end is a justification to one's own mind first; reason still drives the most mad of men. ]

So basically, you'll proceed as you've ever done.

Well said.

[ because isn't that the truth? it's the same conversation he had with a man called a prophet, what feels like centuries ago. ]

...I think so. I think that's what I have to do. [ a little laugh. ] I've reinvented myself enough times that I'm not sure if I have the strength to do it all over again. I might actually turn to dust!

What about you, Eto? What now?

Edited 2023-02-12 14:30 (UTC)

Hm.

As long as in the process of reinvention, you don't end up losing yourself.

[ That, perhaps to her, is true madness -- to lose who you once were, in your entirety.

She thinks, tilting her head back with a sigh, letting the drink in her hand wobble a bit playfully. ]

Well.

I'm starving!

[ something about that first bit sticks. ]

Haha. Well. I've gotten closer than I like, but I've always pulled myself back from the brink. Rise up out of the ashes - like a phoenix. If you fall six times, you stand up seven.

[ the way he says that makes it sound like a mantra, maybe. like something he's told himself before. he doesn't explain, though, keeping the mystery of that little remark to himself, and instead just letting out a little laugh with the wobble. ]

Starving, huh? We can't have that! What do you like to eat? I bet we could scrounge something up.

[ i hate this ]

[ I'm innocent? Honestly after I've played three vore canons/adjacent characters and I'm still not the vore guy, I'm basically immune and unstoppable. ]

It's a popular proverb. Shichiten Hakki, or "fall seven times, get up eight". Though of course, there's also Shichiten Battou, meaning basically the exact opposite...

[ But she sighs, shaking her head. ]

The food here really doesn't cut it. I hope we get something better sooner or later; still, something is better than nothing. Shall we?

[ Anything but the Weedy's. ]

Edited 2023-02-12 14:45 (UTC)

[ i hate you

anyway, he smiles, pleased. bixing's not surprised that she knew the reference, but it always makes him happy, nonetheless. friendship ] That's the one. Someone said it to me, a long time ago, and I've tried to keep it in mind.

[ to say the least. as for food - ]

Yes! I think we might be able to doctor up something decent with enough experimentation, huh? I don't know about you, but I could use the distraction.

[ let's go doctor up some fast food ]