forefall: (to the sound of music)

[personal profile] forefall 2023-03-29 02:49 am (UTC)(link)
[ it is simple for four to victimize herself, to think about how unfair any and every world is to her, to wonder what did she do to deserve such suffering. it doesn't stop her from craving what lu bixing offers. it doesn't stop her from wanting to believe, to think that even if it doesn't make sense to her, shouldn't she accept it?

(she wants to be loved. more than anything, she wants to be loved. she'll throw away almost anything to be loved.)

shouldn't she have someone who will be there for her?

(but he won't, will he? if satan's party isn't a sham, he'll be revived, and he will no longer be there. he will no longer be here.

he will no longer be—)

her eyes well with tears, and they spill over, ugly drop by ugly drop. ]


You promise? No matter what I'll say or do, you won't leave me? No matter what happens, you'll be there?
forefall: (but is it not enough)

[personal profile] forefall 2023-03-30 04:48 am (UTC)(link)
[ it's going to so many corpses if he doesn't watch out.

she lets him because she only needs someone to take the first step once. she needs someone to make that first move despite how she might push them away, in spite of how murderous she can. unfairly, she needs to see if someone will cross the distance even knowing everything she is.

her shoulders tremble a little as he wipes at her face, and her gloved fingers reach out to grab onto any loose fabric of lu bixing's shirt. ]


Okay.

[ she doesn't care about getting everyone out, but she can put a little faith in him, here and now. ]

... I'll watch you.
forefall: (you contain in your eyes)

[personal profile] forefall 2023-04-01 03:42 am (UTC)(link)
[ she looks up at him, as he fusses over her. it's almost odd for her to be one being taken care of when she's the one used to picking up after her sisters when she was alive. she doesn't hate it even it's a little foreign to her. her sisters did love her, but they were all absorbed with their own priorities.

lu bixing treats her so young and it makes her feel so young and maybe she is that young, but it's no less odd a feeling to act her age.

she smiles, almost like she wasn't crying a minute ago, the tears dried and wiped off her face. ]


All right. You can find almost anything in the city, even things you would never have considered. There was some vendor the other day, saying he'd sell you the bones of your enemy, but it's not like he'd know my enemies?

[ she gestures in a direction. ]

There are some freaks around even when you consider the people in our group, so watch out, okay?

[ she's saying, don't give into your terrible taste and be nice to any and every rando. ]