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[ ughhhhghhghghg
happy saturday. once again one of lu bixing's favorites is a murderer!!! at least he knew this one was rough from the beginning but god.
he's decided to go have a drink, honestly. actually? it's the confession one, because he's with lin jingheng, and he doesn't really care about whatever he's going to say while he's drinking it, because it won't be anything new. it's after he's gone to talk to scaramouche, and he slinks into their combined room to wherever lin jingheng is, holding two-no, three carefully balanced to go cups in the crook of his arm. ]
...Hi. [ he says, softly, nudging the door shut with his foot, and making his way over. where u at lin what u doin. ]
happy saturday. once again one of lu bixing's favorites is a murderer!!! at least he knew this one was rough from the beginning but god.
he's decided to go have a drink, honestly. actually? it's the confession one, because he's with lin jingheng, and he doesn't really care about whatever he's going to say while he's drinking it, because it won't be anything new. it's after he's gone to talk to scaramouche, and he slinks into their combined room to wherever lin jingheng is, holding two-no, three carefully balanced to go cups in the crook of his arm. ]
...Hi. [ he says, softly, nudging the door shut with his foot, and making his way over. where u at lin what u doin. ]
Edited (STOP WRITING FRIDAY) 2023-03-12 02:28 (UTC)
[ siting with two to-go cups on the night stand scrolling through his phone. he has behaved and is bandaged even and has actually just been waiting after making some of his rounds to go just. lay with some of his faves on the floor in the void.
normal stuff. ]
Hi.
[ soft. he looks at the drinks that lu bixing has brought with him and shuts his eyes like ah. ]
It's that kind of night.
[ this place is really just enabling them. it's fine. he takes out a cigarette and pops it into the corner of his mouth, searching quietly for a lighter. ]
normal stuff. ]
Hi.
[ soft. he looks at the drinks that lu bixing has brought with him and shuts his eyes like ah. ]
It's that kind of night.
[ this place is really just enabling them. it's fine. he takes out a cigarette and pops it into the corner of his mouth, searching quietly for a lighter. ]
[ he spots lin's drinks and - huffs a little laugh, heart fluttering kind of stupidly in his chest. cute... it's the first thing to bring a little spark back to his eyes as he makes his way over. ]
I guess we had the same idea, huh?
[ sit and have a drink with your favorite person. he sets the cups down and pops the top off of his - there's a decent beer and then a lemony smelling blue drink, and then an affection bite one - and then comes to sit down next to him on the bunk bed. peering curiously over to see what he brought... ]
I guess we had the same idea, huh?
[ sit and have a drink with your favorite person. he sets the cups down and pops the top off of his - there's a decent beer and then a lemony smelling blue drink, and then an affection bite one - and then comes to sit down next to him on the bunk bed. peering curiously over to see what he brought... ]
Edited 2023-03-12 02:42 (UTC)
[ if they're sharing, then he does pop the top off the first one, another beer, and the second one is obnoxiously blue. the sour taste is so strong, but at the same time, he likes the way it hooks into him. it's like a reminder.
lbx your affection bites...
but he'll smile and shift a little bit, giving him some comfy space. ]
Makes the most sense after that shitshow.
[ frowning ] ... How is he?
[ did tiny cat get his arm back? ]
lbx your affection bites...
but he'll smile and shift a little bit, giving him some comfy space. ]
Makes the most sense after that shitshow.
[ frowning ] ... How is he?
[ did tiny cat get his arm back? ]
[ ah... the lin smile is so soothing. he takes his own drink, the healthy mind one, and just takes a sip of it unbothered, and then leans into lin jingheng's side easily and takes up that space. nice.
also i've decided the third cup he has actually smells like that delicious highball whiskey. he's set it kind of far away from the others - just as an option. lin can drink it and go to sleep if he wants, but he also knows its been a rough day and it might be nice to have something that tastes good.
the question about scaramouche... he shakes his head. ]
Angry. I asked him to let me look at his arm and...I did the best I could with it.
[ ... ]
...He's like me, you know. [ the drink loosens his tongue so easily, the confession coming up smooth with the liquor, bittersweet like lemon. ] Someone more built than born.
also i've decided the third cup he has actually smells like that delicious highball whiskey. he's set it kind of far away from the others - just as an option. lin can drink it and go to sleep if he wants, but he also knows its been a rough day and it might be nice to have something that tastes good.
the question about scaramouche... he shakes his head. ]
Angry. I asked him to let me look at his arm and...I did the best I could with it.
[ ... ]
...He's like me, you know. [ the drink loosens his tongue so easily, the confession coming up smooth with the liquor, bittersweet like lemon. ] Someone more built than born.
[ he hums, sipping his own drink slowly, having chosen the sour one. he adjusts the pillows just a bit to situate the both of them comfortably and his brow knits quietly. ]
You did something with it. Probably more than he expected after all of that.
[ he lets out a breath. ]
That old cat spoiled you. [ translation: nature, nurture, something in that vein. he loved you dearly. ]
You did something with it. Probably more than he expected after all of that.
[ he lets out a breath. ]
That old cat spoiled you. [ translation: nature, nurture, something in that vein. he loved you dearly. ]
Edited 2023-03-12 03:15 (UTC)
[ ugh. it makes his heart ache, and something thick well up in his throat, and lu bixing bites the inside of his cheek to calm it back down. ]
...He did. [ he says, softly, letting out a tiny little laugh and turning his face into lin jingheng's shoulder to muffle the feeling, hiding there. ] I have been so lucky.
[ because he could've been scaramouche. in another life, he was that angry kid drawing nuclear weapon schematics in crayon, desperately trying to rebuild. he has been so lucky, to have monoeye, and to have lin. luckier than he can even really process, or even understand. this brings it into a sharp focus. ]
...He did. [ he says, softly, letting out a tiny little laugh and turning his face into lin jingheng's shoulder to muffle the feeling, hiding there. ] I have been so lucky.
[ because he could've been scaramouche. in another life, he was that angry kid drawing nuclear weapon schematics in crayon, desperately trying to rebuild. he has been so lucky, to have monoeye, and to have lin. luckier than he can even really process, or even understand. this brings it into a sharp focus. ]
Edited 2023-03-12 03:23 (UTC)
[ help this is out of nowhere
lu bixing looks a little surprised as he settles into his chair, raising his hand to order something for himself, too, and then glancing over. he looks tired, today, but spending even a moment in lin's company is a balm, so. ]
You - what? [ a pause, and then, he laughs, ducking his head with it.] ... I think that's mathematically impossible.... [ teasing, though. ] Why's that?
lu bixing looks a little surprised as he settles into his chair, raising his hand to order something for himself, too, and then glancing over. he looks tired, today, but spending even a moment in lin's company is a balm, so. ]
You - what? [ a pause, and then, he laughs, ducking his head with it.] ... I think that's mathematically impossible.... [ teasing, though. ] Why's that?
[ he drinks a little more. pausing. and then. ]
You know.
[ don't make him list the names out. ]
Teachers... your hearts are too big. Never understand it.
[ yes he does. he gets it. he knows that lu bixing's capacity to love is so enormous that he can't just tell him to stop. lu bixing instead will run himself into the ground knowing that those he loves are face, and will dig himself even further still when they are dead to learn the truth.
lin jingheng locks an ankle around lu bixing's. this isn't a bad thing. it is just a lu bixing... thing. he goes back to drinking. ]
You know.
[ don't make him list the names out. ]
Teachers... your hearts are too big. Never understand it.
[ yes he does. he gets it. he knows that lu bixing's capacity to love is so enormous that he can't just tell him to stop. lu bixing instead will run himself into the ground knowing that those he loves are face, and will dig himself even further still when they are dead to learn the truth.
lin jingheng locks an ankle around lu bixing's. this isn't a bad thing. it is just a lu bixing... thing. he goes back to drinking. ]
[ yeah. of course he knows. lin jingheng can call him out better than he can ever really hide it. five killers, and four that he's had an incredibly close relationship with. one of whom he had to kill with his own hands.
he falls quiet for a moment, the easy smile fading off of his face, and shifts a little, nudging his ankle against his. he's okay. he lets a little bit more go, lets a little tension out of his shoulders, lets a little of that tiredness show. ]
...Mmm. Your heart's pretty big too, Lin. [ but lu bixing knows that better than anyone else does. he knows how badly he's been hurt, and how carefully guarded he has to be because of it. he knows how lucky he is, that lin found room in his heart to hold him there. he scoots the barstool over a little, enough that they're closer, and shifts to tilt his head against his arm. ]
I'm okay. [ a little more honestly. ] Hearing from them every few days helps. I'll reach out to Scaramouche, even though I'm sure he won't reach out back.
[ affectionate. ] What about you? Are you going to reach out to Childe?
he falls quiet for a moment, the easy smile fading off of his face, and shifts a little, nudging his ankle against his. he's okay. he lets a little bit more go, lets a little tension out of his shoulders, lets a little of that tiredness show. ]
...Mmm. Your heart's pretty big too, Lin. [ but lu bixing knows that better than anyone else does. he knows how badly he's been hurt, and how carefully guarded he has to be because of it. he knows how lucky he is, that lin found room in his heart to hold him there. he scoots the barstool over a little, enough that they're closer, and shifts to tilt his head against his arm. ]
I'm okay. [ a little more honestly. ] Hearing from them every few days helps. I'll reach out to Scaramouche, even though I'm sure he won't reach out back.
[ affectionate. ] What about you? Are you going to reach out to Childe?
Probably.
I want to ask him about that list of names. Just to know.
[ he has a feeling he knows what it is but it's not really anything that's bothering him now. as lu bixing moved closer, he keeps him there, content to linger as long as he needs. ]
Sent one to Cosmos... earlier this week. Will send another probably.
I miss him. Even with you there, the room still feels empty. [ he knows lu bixing will understand bc our roommates fuckin died the same week rip. ]
I want to ask him about that list of names. Just to know.
[ he has a feeling he knows what it is but it's not really anything that's bothering him now. as lu bixing moved closer, he keeps him there, content to linger as long as he needs. ]
Sent one to Cosmos... earlier this week. Will send another probably.
I miss him. Even with you there, the room still feels empty. [ he knows lu bixing will understand bc our roommates fuckin died the same week rip. ]
[ you ever think about how there's an alternate universe where childe killed ljh and lbx went fucking nuclear
anyway. bixing tilts his head enough to look up at him when he says he wrote cosmos - he looks pleased, immediately, searching his face before. he settles back down, warm, and listens to the rest of that sour-tangy drink's effect pull some of lin jingheng's emotions from his mouth. lu bixing knows he feels those things, but to hear him say them... it makes his heart squeeze. ]
...mmm. That's how I feel about Lavi, too. [ he misses lavi so much. misses his noise and his mess and his three AM questions about squirrels and Eden and boys, sometimes, and he just misses him a lot. ] The voice messages aren't quite the same, huh?
anyway. bixing tilts his head enough to look up at him when he says he wrote cosmos - he looks pleased, immediately, searching his face before. he settles back down, warm, and listens to the rest of that sour-tangy drink's effect pull some of lin jingheng's emotions from his mouth. lu bixing knows he feels those things, but to hear him say them... it makes his heart squeeze. ]
...mmm. That's how I feel about Lavi, too. [ he misses lavi so much. misses his noise and his mess and his three AM questions about squirrels and Eden and boys, sometimes, and he just misses him a lot. ] The voice messages aren't quite the same, huh?
[ i have so many sisi tags to do clearly i am just stocking up for my inevitable depression spiral no jk anyways
lu bixing and lin jingheng are exploring and happen to have, perhaps, maybe, ended up in the home biome because who doesn't want to end up back on qiming. for a moment, lin looks at it with the eyes of someone who has literally not seen this beloved little cobbled-together home in... ]
Fourteen years... [ he whispers it softly. and maybe the biome does depend on the person walking in, but, it's clear what lin jingheng believes of as home the moment his foot hits the threshold first: ] Bixing...
[ also his hand has been on lu bixing's lower back like. the entire walk. ]
lu bixing and lin jingheng are exploring and happen to have, perhaps, maybe, ended up in the home biome because who doesn't want to end up back on qiming. for a moment, lin looks at it with the eyes of someone who has literally not seen this beloved little cobbled-together home in... ]
Fourteen years... [ he whispers it softly. and maybe the biome does depend on the person walking in, but, it's clear what lin jingheng believes of as home the moment his foot hits the threshold first: ] Bixing...
[ also his hand has been on lu bixing's lower back like. the entire walk. ]
[ oh lu bixing really loves this. he loves that lin is touching him like this. in public. sorry he loves this he's a top except in every way that he isn't as he leans into it, and -
well, when they look up at the biome, and lu bixing sees the sign hanging over the top of it, it catches his breath.
The Home of Engineer 001 And Commander Lin. ]
Oh.
[ because, well, of course lu bixing sees exactly the same thing. a little house with a garden, with two low tech robots dancing out in the front and holding their sign. it's cute, and it's little, and it's theirs, and his heart just aches as he turns his head and beams at lin jingheng. ]
Welcome home.
[ he's gonna explode. ]
well, when they look up at the biome, and lu bixing sees the sign hanging over the top of it, it catches his breath.
The Home of Engineer 001 And Commander Lin. ]
Oh.
[ because, well, of course lu bixing sees exactly the same thing. a little house with a garden, with two low tech robots dancing out in the front and holding their sign. it's cute, and it's little, and it's theirs, and his heart just aches as he turns his head and beams at lin jingheng. ]
Welcome home.
[ he's gonna explode. ]
I'm home.
[ and in one fell swoop, lin jingheng smiles (smiles) and dips downwards just to hook lu bixing's knees under one arm, and to support his shoulders with the other in a very stylish, princely bridal carry. ]
Should we see how close to home it is?
[ and in one fell swoop, lin jingheng smiles (smiles) and dips downwards just to hook lu bixing's knees under one arm, and to support his shoulders with the other in a very stylish, princely bridal carry. ]
Should we see how close to home it is?
[
I MEAN LIKE HE'S JUST SWEPT OFF HIS FEET
LITERALLY
WOW
lu bixing stares at him in an unfathomable series of emotions that goes from open mouth stupid gaping to a - giggle? a high pitched giggle like he can't contain himself, and he just throws his arms around lin jingheng's neck????? this is it. this is the best day of his entire life. ]
Yes? [ he sounds so delighted ] Yes! Yes, definitely, yes! Over the threshold and everything!
[ sorry its time to be a princess now ]
I MEAN LIKE HE'S JUST SWEPT OFF HIS FEET
LITERALLY
WOW
lu bixing stares at him in an unfathomable series of emotions that goes from open mouth stupid gaping to a - giggle? a high pitched giggle like he can't contain himself, and he just throws his arms around lin jingheng's neck????? this is it. this is the best day of his entire life. ]
Yes? [ he sounds so delighted ] Yes! Yes, definitely, yes! Over the threshold and everything!
[ sorry its time to be a princess now ]
[ time to definitely be a princess. lin jingheng chuckles as he holds lu bixing closer, feeling the arms hook around his neck securely. perfect. this is as it should be. as he steps over that threshold, a warmth fills him like a cup of tea, a glass of water, a tumbler of whiskey. he kicks the door shut and glances around for a long moment, taking it all in.
honestly, for a second, he stops breathing just to savor the air in his lungs like it's straight from home. home... home with lu bixing, with zhanlu, with their little robots that keep sputtering now and then. anyways, over the threshold, held tightly, lin jingheng keeps lu bixing close, eyes surveying over their small kingdom for the time being.
eventually, he glances down at his precious cargo. ]
Where to first, Prime Minister?
honestly, for a second, he stops breathing just to savor the air in his lungs like it's straight from home. home... home with lu bixing, with zhanlu, with their little robots that keep sputtering now and then. anyways, over the threshold, held tightly, lin jingheng keeps lu bixing close, eyes surveying over their small kingdom for the time being.
eventually, he glances down at his precious cargo. ]
Where to first, Prime Minister?
[ he rolls his eyes just a bit. ]
I don't know if you can this time.
[ besides, it's wednesday. he was honestly preparing for it early so he could read before having to deal with people and stock up on some extroversion energy. instead, he's here and he's miserable and he's bruised up already and gagged on his toothbrush and sat in the cold shower like a miserable wet dog. ]
The spoiling...
[ he tilts his head. he. considers. maybe. just a bit. his mouth twitches, but he doesn't smile because he refuses. spoiling him is just allowing him to be in lu bixing's presence. that feels like a gift enough. ]
I don't know if you can this time.
[ besides, it's wednesday. he was honestly preparing for it early so he could read before having to deal with people and stock up on some extroversion energy. instead, he's here and he's miserable and he's bruised up already and gagged on his toothbrush and sat in the cold shower like a miserable wet dog. ]
The spoiling...
[ he tilts his head. he. considers. maybe. just a bit. his mouth twitches, but he doesn't smile because he refuses. spoiling him is just allowing him to be in lu bixing's presence. that feels like a gift enough. ]
No.
But I like them. I like hearing their voices. It means they're within reach.
[ the drink gurgles a little bit. he hits ice. jingheng drinks the way a man denied water gorges himself after weeks in the desert. he drowns every sentiment he hates. ]
We aren't leaving without them.
But I like them. I like hearing their voices. It means they're within reach.
[ the drink gurgles a little bit. he hits ice. jingheng drinks the way a man denied water gorges himself after weeks in the desert. he drowns every sentiment he hates. ]
We aren't leaving without them.
[ this is the best day of lu bixing's life. he has fantasized about this kind of thing. like. extensively. he kicks his lil dress shoe wearing feet a bit like he can't help himself, tucking in closer to lin and just - surveying. he could almost see zhanlu, puttering around. it feels so right to have lin jingheng here, again. this place has felt more like a tomb than a home, lately, and so to be here with lin is just...
he tucks his head a little against lin jingheng's and tries to tamp down on the urge to giggle again, though he is smiling like a fucking idiot as he stares out at their house. he's going to have to get popcorn, later. he'll be thrilled.
when lin jingheng looks down, lu bixing is just smiling at him with the most adoring look on his face you've ever seen in your entire life. he's feeling especially daring, too, and in love, so - ]
...Our room, maybe?
[ a place he hasn't slept in in fourteen years. ]
he tucks his head a little against lin jingheng's and tries to tamp down on the urge to giggle again, though he is smiling like a fucking idiot as he stares out at their house. he's going to have to get popcorn, later. he'll be thrilled.
when lin jingheng looks down, lu bixing is just smiling at him with the most adoring look on his face you've ever seen in your entire life. he's feeling especially daring, too, and in love, so - ]
...Our room, maybe?
[ a place he hasn't slept in in fourteen years. ]
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