[ oh. watching lin take a pull from the joint surprises him - it makes lu bixing want to babble, desperately, makes his heart sing and flutter with the same flipping, nervous butterflies it did seventeen years ago, makes him want to tell him everything all at once. did you know, i started smoking just because i wanted to feel closer to you? did you know, i experimented on myself with biochips, i used sleeping pills and relaxants and everything i could do so i could dream about a world that still had you in it? but he doesn't. the words don't come to his mouth.
for the better, probably. the weed makes his head floaty, floatier than he'd normally ever like, and it makes zhanlu's softly singing robotic voice sound like it's melting into the background. he feels heavy, lets himself stay that way, and just tucks into jingheng's side. ]
I don't know if there was anything I could have done. [ either way. for four. for eto. ]
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for the better, probably. the weed makes his head floaty, floatier than he'd normally ever like, and it makes zhanlu's softly singing robotic voice sound like it's melting into the background. he feels heavy, lets himself stay that way, and just tucks into jingheng's side. ]
I don't know if there was anything I could have done. [ either way. for four. for eto. ]