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[ oh this... this is the face of love. his heart swells and beats too fast, or maybe this is normal-fast... or maybe normal-fast is lin jingheng's "heart aflutter." he squeezes him closer just a bit... puppy... ]
... I would like that.
[ a small curl to his lips as he glances around, wandering a slow path as he observes everything, gazes out windows with a semi-lost look in his eyes before he feels the threshold of the bedroom underfoot, as the door opens the familiar sight envelops the both of them. his fingers tighten enough against the angle of lu bixing's trousers that the fabric grows tense in his grip. ]
It's like I was never gone...
[ it feels untouched. it's artificial, it's not real, but the person beside him is real, and zhanlu, inactive as he is, is also just as real. as if adhering to an old rhythm, lin jingheng carries lu bixing to the bed and doesn't even allow him on his feet, rather, sits him down on the edge. as he turns, it's followed by a series of deft movements: releasing the clasps of zhanlu on his arm, someone that never leaves his side, and sets him on the nightstand, pulling off his gloves.
and that is when he gets down on a knee... and pulls one of lu bixing's dress shoes onto his knee, beginning to slowly undo the laces with bare fingers soundlessly. ]
... I would like that.
[ a small curl to his lips as he glances around, wandering a slow path as he observes everything, gazes out windows with a semi-lost look in his eyes before he feels the threshold of the bedroom underfoot, as the door opens the familiar sight envelops the both of them. his fingers tighten enough against the angle of lu bixing's trousers that the fabric grows tense in his grip. ]
It's like I was never gone...
[ it feels untouched. it's artificial, it's not real, but the person beside him is real, and zhanlu, inactive as he is, is also just as real. as if adhering to an old rhythm, lin jingheng carries lu bixing to the bed and doesn't even allow him on his feet, rather, sits him down on the edge. as he turns, it's followed by a series of deft movements: releasing the clasps of zhanlu on his arm, someone that never leaves his side, and sets him on the nightstand, pulling off his gloves.
and that is when he gets down on a knee... and pulls one of lu bixing's dress shoes onto his knee, beginning to slowly undo the laces with bare fingers soundlessly. ]
[ clean puppy!!!!
the patience is truly something that lin jingheng seldom sees from lu bixing in these particular situations. he's an insatiable, squirming thing and lin jingheng huffs a laugh as he lets his hand slide slowly down his chest. he pauses there, just over his heartbeat with their fingers interlaced. the squeeze earns a soft hum as he gradually begins to drag that hand slowly down his ribs, to rest gently over his abdomen.
the squeeze earns a hum, pleased and rare, and he presses closer, as though trying to encapsulate that little, pleased giggle in a bubble between the both of them. lin jingheng doesn't flinch, and as the shower is uncomfortable, he doesn't care, pushing him slowly against the tile. is this what he'd hoped for? lin jiingheng is feeling nerves gathering in his hand as he lets it slide slowly downwards while he mouths at the curve of lu bixing's neck. his eyes flutter shut as he tries to focus, letting the cool water hit his back, shielding lu bixing from it and instead letting him bask in the warmth of his own skin. ]
I think you're still dirty, [ he says, very softly. his voice hesitates just a bit. it can't be helped. hand straying lower [goose honk] ]
the patience is truly something that lin jingheng seldom sees from lu bixing in these particular situations. he's an insatiable, squirming thing and lin jingheng huffs a laugh as he lets his hand slide slowly down his chest. he pauses there, just over his heartbeat with their fingers interlaced. the squeeze earns a soft hum as he gradually begins to drag that hand slowly down his ribs, to rest gently over his abdomen.
the squeeze earns a hum, pleased and rare, and he presses closer, as though trying to encapsulate that little, pleased giggle in a bubble between the both of them. lin jingheng doesn't flinch, and as the shower is uncomfortable, he doesn't care, pushing him slowly against the tile. is this what he'd hoped for? lin jiingheng is feeling nerves gathering in his hand as he lets it slide slowly downwards while he mouths at the curve of lu bixing's neck. his eyes flutter shut as he tries to focus, letting the cool water hit his back, shielding lu bixing from it and instead letting him bask in the warmth of his own skin. ]
I think you're still dirty, [ he says, very softly. his voice hesitates just a bit. it can't be helped. hand straying lower [goose honk] ]
[ it is untouched, really - in real life and in an silly, artificial little exhibit. there's a whole tidal wave of emotions that threatens to knock him over, between lin jingheng being like, unreasonably cute and the fact that they're standing in their house. even if it's fake, it's still home.
he never thought he'd get to have this again. in a fit of madness, he almost recreated it, and now it's here. it feels like he's dreaming. for a moment, he's just too emotional to really say anything, just tucking his head into lin jingheng's neck as he carries him up the stairs and nodding into his shoulder. it's like i was never gone.
they're different people, but at the same time, they aren't. it's still the home of commander lin and engineer 001, and they're still commander lin and engineer 001. by the time lin sets him down, he's managed to compose himself around all of his butterflies, watching lin jingheng go through the motions of a normal night. he closes his eye, just briefly, and when lin turns away, he pinches himself.
not dreaming.
which is good, because lin jingheng kneels down in front of him and he has an absolutely hysterical train of thoughts before he swallows, watching him and curling his hands in the soft blankets on their bed. fumbling, a little, breathlessly: ] You don't have to...
[ but also oh. okay. wow. what is happening. he's gonna die. ]
he never thought he'd get to have this again. in a fit of madness, he almost recreated it, and now it's here. it feels like he's dreaming. for a moment, he's just too emotional to really say anything, just tucking his head into lin jingheng's neck as he carries him up the stairs and nodding into his shoulder. it's like i was never gone.
they're different people, but at the same time, they aren't. it's still the home of commander lin and engineer 001, and they're still commander lin and engineer 001. by the time lin sets him down, he's managed to compose himself around all of his butterflies, watching lin jingheng go through the motions of a normal night. he closes his eye, just briefly, and when lin turns away, he pinches himself.
not dreaming.
which is good, because lin jingheng kneels down in front of him and he has an absolutely hysterical train of thoughts before he swallows, watching him and curling his hands in the soft blankets on their bed. fumbling, a little, breathlessly: ] You don't have to...
[ but also oh. okay. wow. what is happening. he's gonna die. ]
Can't wear shoes in bed, right?
[ he's treating u like a prince. incredible.
but yeah, the shoelaces are untied methodically and once his shoes are off, they are placed at the side at attention. he'll join him next, rising to his feet just to carefully pulls off his boots, and for a moment it does indeed feel like home. it's a place to feel safe, and where he's sure lu xin would say, it's a place to kick off your shoes. right?
but finally he'll just...
place a knee on the bed and very easily place a hand on lu bixing's chest, pushing him down onto his back. his dark hair falls a bit into his face at the angle. ]
Will you welcome me home?
[ he's treating u like a prince. incredible.
but yeah, the shoelaces are untied methodically and once his shoes are off, they are placed at the side at attention. he'll join him next, rising to his feet just to carefully pulls off his boots, and for a moment it does indeed feel like home. it's a place to feel safe, and where he's sure lu xin would say, it's a place to kick off your shoes. right?
but finally he'll just...
place a knee on the bed and very easily place a hand on lu bixing's chest, pushing him down onto his back. his dark hair falls a bit into his face at the angle. ]
Will you welcome me home?
[ see, like this, lu bixing is pretty sure lin jingheng could ask him for the entire world on a string and he'd say yes. he could ask him to kill someone and he'd probably do it. (he knows he wouldn't.) he's just completely and utterly bamboozled by it, the same way lin has, so many times, swept him off of his feet.
he exhales all of the breath in his lungs in a woosh as he's pushed backwards, dropping back against the bed, sprawled out and trying to remember where his limbs need to go. the light hits jingheng at the perfect angle, casting a shadow over his face, making his silvery eyes look like molten metal. it makes his heart skip a beat, sends a shiver down his spine, sends his frantic little scientist brain diving into two different categories, somewhere between i've-read-too-many-romance-novels and dopamine-adrenaline-cortisol-eyes-dilating-heart-racing-oh-hot-this-is-hot and not surfacing for air. the fact that he makes words with his mouth is a miracle that only an established relationship and alpha week allow for. ]
...Any way you want, my Commander. [ it's just as breathless, but his mouth curls into a smile, a twinkle in his eyes. he is just completely putty in lin's hands, arching up a little to the hand that pushed him down, starting to lift his hands to reach to pull lin down. ] Anytime.
he exhales all of the breath in his lungs in a woosh as he's pushed backwards, dropping back against the bed, sprawled out and trying to remember where his limbs need to go. the light hits jingheng at the perfect angle, casting a shadow over his face, making his silvery eyes look like molten metal. it makes his heart skip a beat, sends a shiver down his spine, sends his frantic little scientist brain diving into two different categories, somewhere between i've-read-too-many-romance-novels and dopamine-adrenaline-cortisol-eyes-dilating-heart-racing-oh-hot-this-is-hot and not surfacing for air. the fact that he makes words with his mouth is a miracle that only an established relationship and alpha week allow for. ]
...Any way you want, my Commander. [ it's just as breathless, but his mouth curls into a smile, a twinkle in his eyes. he is just completely putty in lin's hands, arching up a little to the hand that pushed him down, starting to lift his hands to reach to pull lin down. ] Anytime.
[ you have to stop calling it alpha week (no)
the hands are welcome, and like a tired beast, he leans into them, releasing the tension in his own body that has made everything stilted and awkward for him in this position. instead, he swallows up the last syllable of "anytime" and kisses lu bixing on the mouth, a slow reunion in a space that could be home for the time being. same window, same sunset, same sounds and smells.
he pushes down with a hand, weighty, but reassuring. ]
Stay down... you don't have to go anywhere. I'm right here, Bixing.
[ as he lets fingers make slow work of undoing each button (this is a biome sir) EACH BUTTON, letting fingertips slowly skim up his chest with a small, satisfied smile, dipping low and hooking into his belt.
another kiss, slower, consuming this time. it's real. ]
the hands are welcome, and like a tired beast, he leans into them, releasing the tension in his own body that has made everything stilted and awkward for him in this position. instead, he swallows up the last syllable of "anytime" and kisses lu bixing on the mouth, a slow reunion in a space that could be home for the time being. same window, same sunset, same sounds and smells.
he pushes down with a hand, weighty, but reassuring. ]
Stay down... you don't have to go anywhere. I'm right here, Bixing.
[ as he lets fingers make slow work of undoing each button (this is a biome sir) EACH BUTTON, letting fingertips slowly skim up his chest with a small, satisfied smile, dipping low and hooking into his belt.
another kiss, slower, consuming this time. it's real. ]
[ i won't! thanks!!
anyway. it may be confidence week, it may be alpha week, but lu bixing is officially smothering down any single emotion he feels relating to needing to be Strong and Confident mostly because uh, he's in heaven. this is it. like. he has, quite literally, dreamed about this. he has fantasized about this exact situation in any number of oh-i'll-have-to-sell-lin-my-body fantasies that occupy his idle thoughts. he's already pinched himself once or he might do it again.
bixing has forgotten entirely about the situation of this biome and the fact that it's not actually their house because his brain is so completely occupied by lin jingheng out here doing lin jingheng things. that hand on his chest feels like a brand and a hearth all at once, and his lashes flutter as he watches jingheng unbutton his buttons on his nerdy little oxford shirt one by one and like, barely breathes. he doesn't know exactly where this is going - well, he does, kind of - but god damn is he along for the ride.
the noise he makes into lin jingheng's mouth is needy and a little desperate, and okay, he's probably supposed to stay down but he just threads his fingers into his hair and holds him there, kisses him back and exhales shakily when he pulls away, bright red in the cheeks, lashes fluttering. ]
...welcome home. [ he repeats, in that same breathless voice from before, drawing a knee up to rest against lin jingheng's hips, just for the sake of touching him in as many places as physically possible. ]
anyway. it may be confidence week, it may be alpha week, but lu bixing is officially smothering down any single emotion he feels relating to needing to be Strong and Confident mostly because uh, he's in heaven. this is it. like. he has, quite literally, dreamed about this. he has fantasized about this exact situation in any number of oh-i'll-have-to-sell-lin-my-body fantasies that occupy his idle thoughts. he's already pinched himself once or he might do it again.
bixing has forgotten entirely about the situation of this biome and the fact that it's not actually their house because his brain is so completely occupied by lin jingheng out here doing lin jingheng things. that hand on his chest feels like a brand and a hearth all at once, and his lashes flutter as he watches jingheng unbutton his buttons on his nerdy little oxford shirt one by one and like, barely breathes. he doesn't know exactly where this is going - well, he does, kind of - but god damn is he along for the ride.
the noise he makes into lin jingheng's mouth is needy and a little desperate, and okay, he's probably supposed to stay down but he just threads his fingers into his hair and holds him there, kisses him back and exhales shakily when he pulls away, bright red in the cheeks, lashes fluttering. ]
...welcome home. [ he repeats, in that same breathless voice from before, drawing a knee up to rest against lin jingheng's hips, just for the sake of touching him in as many places as physically possible. ]
[ cute? the head tilt, the way he seems to consider it, the little twitch at his mouth, it's all cute. bixing hums, tilting his head from where he's sort of blanketing lin already to put a hand on his opposite cheek (face) and turn his head gently so he can press kisses to his jaw and his cheek closest to him, sweet and sticky. ]
Mmmm, do you like that? [ the spoiling, that is. ] That's easy. I could spoil you every day, you know? You do that to me all the time, it's the least I can do to return the favor.
[ he sure does, lu bixing is a spoiled child who gets everything he wants. ] I'll make you breakfast. [ kiss. ] Bring it to you in bed. [ kiss. ] Maybe without a shirt on? [ kiiiisssss ♥ ]
Mmmm, do you like that? [ the spoiling, that is. ] That's easy. I could spoil you every day, you know? You do that to me all the time, it's the least I can do to return the favor.
[ he sure does, lu bixing is a spoiled child who gets everything he wants. ] I'll make you breakfast. [ kiss. ] Bring it to you in bed. [ kiss. ] Maybe without a shirt on? [ kiiiisssss ♥ ]
[ hee hee we're going up the steps after some serious drinking. lin jingheng is maybe a little pushy, having spent enough time in this get up, having had to mingle and mill around and dance with people he's found himself caring about, knowing he's going to have to worry about each and every one of them tomorrow. as he pulls, he lets his eyes fall to the dance floor, following a few figures before he turns his attention fully on lu bixing.
his heart is racing, so instead of worrying, he demands something else, tugging at lu bixing's coat with a sharp pull-pull and drawing him into one of the many many rooms.
fuck it. ]
I'm done with sharing you with everyone else. It's annoying.
his heart is racing, so instead of worrying, he demands something else, tugging at lu bixing's coat with a sharp pull-pull and drawing him into one of the many many rooms.
fuck it. ]
I'm done with sharing you with everyone else. It's annoying.
[ pushy is fine. pushy is great! pushy is amazing. lu bixing is tipsy and happy and like, floating on clouds right now so he lets lin jingheng herd him upstairs with little complaining, reaching back out to hold his hand, to touch him just for the sake of touching him. the look outward at the dance floor is nice, and he follows his gaze curiously for a moment, but -
well, okay, being yanked into a room is incredibly attractive so everything else goes right out of his head. he makes a surprised noise, a little yelp, and then brightens up, the emotional leak share of one of his drinks going surprised-delighted-a-tiny-bit-horny-thrilled all at once as he's pulled in.
lu bixing brightens, and immediately pulls the door shut behind him, kicking it with his heel and locking it behind him. occupied. ]
Well, if that's the case, I'm all yours - I'm always all yours. [ duh. he drops his hands, skating them down lin jingheng's tiny, tiny waist, curling them at his hips, and then ducking his head in to steal a kiss. just a quick one. ] Is it later?
[ cheeky ]
well, okay, being yanked into a room is incredibly attractive so everything else goes right out of his head. he makes a surprised noise, a little yelp, and then brightens up, the emotional leak share of one of his drinks going surprised-delighted-a-tiny-bit-horny-thrilled all at once as he's pulled in.
lu bixing brightens, and immediately pulls the door shut behind him, kicking it with his heel and locking it behind him. occupied. ]
Well, if that's the case, I'm all yours - I'm always all yours. [ duh. he drops his hands, skating them down lin jingheng's tiny, tiny waist, curling them at his hips, and then ducking his head in to steal a kiss. just a quick one. ] Is it later?
[ cheeky ]
It's "later."
[ he whispers it between the stolen kiss (it tastes like your favorite thing) and another one that he presses into the corner of his mouth, hands sliding up to hold his face close. thumbs stroke the rise of lu bixing's cheekbones. touch is not something that lin jingheng doles out easily, nor does he accept it willingly. sitting next to him is like sitting next to the world's most finicky cat sometimes.
instead, he craves touch: ]
Now...
[ his hand slides against he lapel of his coat. ]
Can I help you with this?
[ he whispers it between the stolen kiss (it tastes like your favorite thing) and another one that he presses into the corner of his mouth, hands sliding up to hold his face close. thumbs stroke the rise of lu bixing's cheekbones. touch is not something that lin jingheng doles out easily, nor does he accept it willingly. sitting next to him is like sitting next to the world's most finicky cat sometimes.
instead, he craves touch: ]
Now...
[ his hand slides against he lapel of his coat. ]
Can I help you with this?
[ well, see - bixing's favorite flavor is lin jingheng, so, that's not hard. he leans into the hands on his face almost immediately, skin flushed warm and pleased from the alcohol and the interaction, and sighs into the kiss, happy and content, easily making it more open mouthed. he's always been kind of a handsy drunk and this comes at no surprise, so, tipsy just makes him bold, and combined with the fact that jingheng has definitely been hitting the love potion bottle, it should be a good night.
his mouth quirks against lin jingheng's, and he pulls back just a little. ]
Please. [ definitely, yes.
he's not going to give him a ton of time to do it, though, mostly because he's touchy as always and he will use the one very brief second of element of surprise that he has here to turn them around and pin lin jingheng up to the doorway, crowding him up against it, sliding a leg between his and ducking in to immediately kiss him again. yes you can take his coat off but you can have the additional challenge of having to do it while he is All Over You. ]
his mouth quirks against lin jingheng's, and he pulls back just a little. ]
Please. [ definitely, yes.
he's not going to give him a ton of time to do it, though, mostly because he's touchy as always and he will use the one very brief second of element of surprise that he has here to turn them around and pin lin jingheng up to the doorway, crowding him up against it, sliding a leg between his and ducking in to immediately kiss him again. yes you can take his coat off but you can have the additional challenge of having to do it while he is All Over You. ]
[ wow the door hello. lin jingheng laughs, actually laughs. it's not a giggle by any means, but it's soft, breathless between their mouths as he shoves off his coat, pushing with fingers and palms until it can hit the floor completely. he runs his hands up his arms to his shoulders, fingers gripping, sliding upwards to assure lu bixing he's here, he's touching him—
and then, thanks to that whisper, he dives immediately for his back, sinking fingers into the warm muscle of his sholder blades, pulling him closer.
maybe u should be worried because lin jingheng is eager to be just as all over him, grip like steel, teeth teasing at his lower lip. between one kiss and the next: ]
I like it.
[ man. thanks thancred. ]
and then, thanks to that whisper, he dives immediately for his back, sinking fingers into the warm muscle of his sholder blades, pulling him closer.
maybe u should be worried because lin jingheng is eager to be just as all over him, grip like steel, teeth teasing at his lower lip. between one kiss and the next: ]
I like it.
[ man. thanks thancred. ]
[ bixing does not impede this at all. he rolls his shoulders backwards and sticks his arms out when necessary to half shimmy free of the princely coat he got to wear, and hits the ground in a soft thump of satin and thick fabric. it was a perfect fit, and underneath...
...yeah, of course he's wearing the backless thing thancred picked out for him. it's a vest that nicely fits his body, skims over the muscles that he's (maybe surprisingly, to other people) earned, over the dark fabric that's a nice contrast to the warm tones of his skin. he smiles, too, mouth quirked up delightedly at jingheng's reaction, at the teeth, as he presses his thigh upwards and makes a soft pleased noise, arching into the grip of his hands. he's going to be wearing faded scratch marks again this week, but that's fine. at this point he's shameless. actually, he's just always been shameless, but maybe that's besides the point.
another kiss, then another - open mouthed and wanting before he forces himself to pull away, nudges lin jingheng's jaw up and presses kisses up the line to it, murmurs in his ear, suggestive and flirtatious, low and sweet: ]
I can keep it on the whole time, if you want?
[ hehe. ]
...yeah, of course he's wearing the backless thing thancred picked out for him. it's a vest that nicely fits his body, skims over the muscles that he's (maybe surprisingly, to other people) earned, over the dark fabric that's a nice contrast to the warm tones of his skin. he smiles, too, mouth quirked up delightedly at jingheng's reaction, at the teeth, as he presses his thigh upwards and makes a soft pleased noise, arching into the grip of his hands. he's going to be wearing faded scratch marks again this week, but that's fine. at this point he's shameless. actually, he's just always been shameless, but maybe that's besides the point.
another kiss, then another - open mouthed and wanting before he forces himself to pull away, nudges lin jingheng's jaw up and presses kisses up the line to it, murmurs in his ear, suggestive and flirtatious, low and sweet: ]
I can keep it on the whole time, if you want?
[ hehe. ]
[ god he's just. he's. here in the planetarium and he's hunched over, arms wrapped around lu bixing tightly. they've been here for an hour now, maybe, letting the starlight fall in the dark room, watching the godforsaken fiery sky where the telescopes are turned upwards.
there's a small paper cup with three cigarettes just shoved inside, and lin jingheng is smoking out a fourth, letting the ash fall onto his knee quietly.
softly, zhanlu whispers a little lullaby from a nearby seat. lin jingheng wraps both bare arms around lu bixing, having refused to let him go for the most recent half hour of their planetarium stint. ]
there's a small paper cup with three cigarettes just shoved inside, and lin jingheng is smoking out a fourth, letting the ash fall onto his knee quietly.
softly, zhanlu whispers a little lullaby from a nearby seat. lin jingheng wraps both bare arms around lu bixing, having refused to let him go for the most recent half hour of their planetarium stint. ]
[ every week, this is what lu bixing is terrified of. there's nothing scarier to him than waking up and knowing that someone he cares about is dead. and it's worse, it's so much worse, like this. at least with eto, she wasn't there. kon was right there. kon was -
(like a prodigy, to me. like a successor. like someone i've never had.)
he's ust stayed like this, curled up in lin jingheng's arms. now that they're away from everyone else, he's silent, finally letting some of his prime minister facade go, okay to just. just be upset, here, to cling tight to lin jingheng's jacket and inhale the scent of his smoke and just kind of. disassociate.
an hour or so into this, he finally speaks up, voice soft and low, burying his cheek against lin's chest, listening to zhanlu's soft, familiar voice sing sotto, and murmurs: ] ...He's okay. [ somewhere. with the others. he has to convince himself. he knows that, even if he gets their messages, even if he just - he knows, he knows, but it doesn't make it any easier. ]
(like a prodigy, to me. like a successor. like someone i've never had.)
he's ust stayed like this, curled up in lin jingheng's arms. now that they're away from everyone else, he's silent, finally letting some of his prime minister facade go, okay to just. just be upset, here, to cling tight to lin jingheng's jacket and inhale the scent of his smoke and just kind of. disassociate.
an hour or so into this, he finally speaks up, voice soft and low, burying his cheek against lin's chest, listening to zhanlu's soft, familiar voice sing sotto, and murmurs: ] ...He's okay. [ somewhere. with the others. he has to convince himself. he knows that, even if he gets their messages, even if he just - he knows, he knows, but it doesn't make it any easier. ]
He's in good hands. I trust most of the people stuck there.
[ tighter he is holding his puppy, chugging away like a train with his cigarette. his breath rattles tiredly. ]
Bixing...
[ he clutches quietly at him. ]
We'll take them back. [ tighter, he tucks his face in against him. ]
[ tighter he is holding his puppy, chugging away like a train with his cigarette. his breath rattles tiredly. ]
Bixing...
[ he clutches quietly at him. ]
We'll take them back. [ tighter, he tucks his face in against him. ]
[ here's something about the phrasing that sticks.
we'll take them back.
he looks up, suddenly - eye full of tears, something thick in his throat, and up comes something he probably should've said a while ago, but his hands curl tight in jingheng's clothes, and lu bixing blurts out, in a rush - ]
Lin, I want to bring him back with us. Gideon and Harrowhark, too.
we'll take them back.
he looks up, suddenly - eye full of tears, something thick in his throat, and up comes something he probably should've said a while ago, but his hands curl tight in jingheng's clothes, and lu bixing blurts out, in a rush - ]
Lin, I want to bring him back with us. Gideon and Harrowhark, too.
[ their home is going to become so loud. somehow, lin jingheng doesn't actually care. he sees these tears in his eyes and shifts thumbs to slowly wipe at them. oh... ]
... We'll...
[ oh wow oh god uhhh he just shuts his eyes. ]
Lu Bixing... whatever, whoever you want to bring home with us...
... you can have that. Always.
... We'll...
[ oh wow oh god uhhh he just shuts his eyes. ]
Lu Bixing... whatever, whoever you want to bring home with us...
... you can have that. Always.
[ this is just so. weh. his lower lip wobbles for just a second before he sucks it back again, as he tries to reckon with the feeling of losing someone he came to consider so important to him in the only way he knows how. by fixing it, trying to engineer a solution, by trying to make things better, trying not to think about tomorrow.
lin just shatters his composure like always, though. he turns his face into the thumb on his cheek, as the first tears finally drop from his eye, and just nods. it's all he really has, at first. i want to bring you home, too. there's still so much to be done, so many problems to solve, the ability to find a way to bring the others back --
he hiccups, finally, takes his hand and presses it against lin jingheng's on his cheek, and then turns his face to kiss his palm, nodding uselessly against his hand. that's all he really has, for the moment. ]
lin just shatters his composure like always, though. he turns his face into the thumb on his cheek, as the first tears finally drop from his eye, and just nods. it's all he really has, at first. i want to bring you home, too. there's still so much to be done, so many problems to solve, the ability to find a way to bring the others back --
he hiccups, finally, takes his hand and presses it against lin jingheng's on his cheek, and then turns his face to kiss his palm, nodding uselessly against his hand. that's all he really has, for the moment. ]
[ it just kind of happens in the blink of an eye, during trial. jingheng must've only looked away for a second, before lu bixing vanished.
he's not in the house, or in either of their rooms. not frantically baking, trying desperately to keep his mind off of whatever just happened. no. when lin jingheng finally does find him, he's in a corner of the loud bar on the giant island. it's a little quieter in this room. it's fine. he's tucked into a corner, eye closed, holding a cup.
really, there are a few too many drinks stacked on the table. it's not like he doesn't know what all of these do, so today, they're just the red cups of beer. ]
he's not in the house, or in either of their rooms. not frantically baking, trying desperately to keep his mind off of whatever just happened. no. when lin jingheng finally does find him, he's in a corner of the loud bar on the giant island. it's a little quieter in this room. it's fine. he's tucked into a corner, eye closed, holding a cup.
really, there are a few too many drinks stacked on the table. it's not like he doesn't know what all of these do, so today, they're just the red cups of beer. ]
Edited 2023-03-19 01:48 (UTC)
[ it's the drinks on the table that get jingheng to beeline it towards the island. he's been searching everywhere for bixing, like an absolute maniac, pacing the ferry here and running until he's panting a bit by the time he makes it to the thundering rain forest bar. because fuck you lu bixing, after all of that, you can't just run.
he crouches here, at lu bixing just curled up, holding this cup, and then crawls into this corner as well now. crowds him quietly. there's a thunderous sound overhead because like. it's the rainforest bar. it's terrible. but he's here.
he holds him tightly. ]
he crouches here, at lu bixing just curled up, holding this cup, and then crawls into this corner as well now. crowds him quietly. there's a thunderous sound overhead because like. it's the rainforest bar. it's terrible. but he's here.
he holds him tightly. ]
[ lmao well
he has been drinking heavily, and it becomes like, immediately obvious, because he just reeks of alcohol. it's probably a good thing this and weed are like, the strongest thing that they have here. curled up in this corner, away from the world, he finally let himself go, let the guilt grab him by the insides and twist them up into pieces. by the time he sees lin jingheng, his reaction time is slow enough that there's nothing he can do to stop it.
he hiccups, a half desperate - ] No - [ no, you can't see me like this, no, but it's too late, and as he's crowded, he tenses up miserably and then shudders. hiccups again. ]
he has been drinking heavily, and it becomes like, immediately obvious, because he just reeks of alcohol. it's probably a good thing this and weed are like, the strongest thing that they have here. curled up in this corner, away from the world, he finally let himself go, let the guilt grab him by the insides and twist them up into pieces. by the time he sees lin jingheng, his reaction time is slow enough that there's nothing he can do to stop it.
he hiccups, a half desperate - ] No - [ no, you can't see me like this, no, but it's too late, and as he's crowded, he tenses up miserably and then shudders. hiccups again. ]
[ that wobble is... god he feels it. there's a wash here, that honeyed aftertaste of a drink that makes his emotions flood forward even when he wants to keep them to himself. the desire to protect everything he has left is what trumps all of it. bixing hiccups and he holds his gaze.
it takes everything inside of him not to snarl and bare his teeth at the world.
he doesn't have to speak, lin jingheng whispers instead. ]
He'll have his own room. And Zhanlu will meet Yoru... [ gentler ] Gideon will break things and Harrow will have the place crawling and... we'll...
[ his voice catches. he stops. he doesn't have anymore. instead, he rests their foreheads together. ]
Our Home... Bixing... we're almost there.
it takes everything inside of him not to snarl and bare his teeth at the world.
he doesn't have to speak, lin jingheng whispers instead. ]
He'll have his own room. And Zhanlu will meet Yoru... [ gentler ] Gideon will break things and Harrow will have the place crawling and... we'll...
[ his voice catches. he stops. he doesn't have anymore. instead, he rests their foreheads together. ]
Our Home... Bixing... we're almost there.
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